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I just returned home from being out of town for a week. While I greatly enjoyed the people and places I visited this past week, there is definitely something special about home and I am very glad to be here.

On the ride back into town, the conversation took a rather odd turn to the morbid. Conversation between coworkers usually has to do with the latest project, department news, our field, CPA exams, and the like. Instead, we began really talking about things that mattered and it was very refreshing.

I mentioned how I was bad about keeping in touch with my parents and how I should do a better job of calling them. Alex mentioned that on a trip back from New Orleans he was really tired and meant to call his mother but put it off until the next day. That following day she died and he thinks about that night from time to time and how he could have had that last contact if he had just picked up the phone. A very similar story was told by Casey involving her grandmother.
It got me thinking about the urgency with which we should live our lives and how horribly off my focus is nearly 100% of the time.

My ability to complain, whine, moan, bitch, and pretty much be a seed of discontent is limitless. It comes naturally. Why can't I just be grateful? There are absolutely a ton of things to be grateful for, yet I let my petty worries and fears get in the way of my contentment.

I am probably being too hard on myself. I strive daily to be thankful for what I have, but my selfish, deceitful heart often prevents me from totally being content and living in the moment. Nevertheless, the guy I am today is a vast improvement over who I was years ago. I am most definitely a work in process and I plan on being one until I take my dirt nap.

Another realization from this trip is that I am entirely too severe. Maybe I'll bring that up again at another date.