My Heart Hurts

I am very discouraged. My Old Testament Bible Survey left me very distraught.

I will preface by saying that I do believe the leader is a man after God's own heart. However, I was very upset with some of the things he said. First off, we talked about the Earth being created 10,000 years ago (but with age theory) and dinosaurs being on the ark. He did go over other creation ideas as well. That's not really the biggest problem I had, I understand that this is a big debate with people in both camps. What was more discouraging were sexist comments made about men and women and a light mocking of Mormonism and Judaism. If we are supposed to share Christ's love, who is going to listen if we come off as arrogant and full of contempt for the beliefs of others? Who wants to become a Christian if it means demeaning others? What happened to walking humbly and loving mercy?

Merging faith, intellect, and sexuality has proven much harder than I thought. I decided to say an honest (and possibly prideful) prayer last night. The gist was, "Ok God, I know you have called me back twice and that I have felt your love like I have never felt before. I have so many questions and I know I will not get all the answers. Please guide me and help me to love others. Give me the patience necessary to carry out your will for my life. Amen" Well, that's definitely a paraphrase, but you get the picture. Sometimes you just feel a little lost, and it is so frustrating. I miss my old black and white world...